Whose Feelings are you willing to hurt?

Here we find ourselves at the end of January 2023. This is the first (and some say most important) month of the year. The launch of all of our December dreaming to finally achieve our health and wellness goals. But there were a few things we didn’t count on.

We didn’t count on January events with friends. We didn’t count on the surprise family visit or early weekend getaway. We didn’t expect the invitation to brunch or breakfast after we have carefully planned the week’s eating plan.

Now what?

A single meal doesn’t take you off track, and neither does a drink or two. What can happen, however, is the guilt and frustration you feel the day after. All the carefully laid plans are shot. And all because you chose not to stick to your plan in order to avoid hurting the feelings of your family and friends.

If you did not share the importance of your commitment to yourself with others, let’s say to do “Dry January”, you cannot ask for their support in not judging you for declining their kind invitation, or sticking to tonic water all evening.

If you aren’t willing to ask in advance what will be on the menu at your friend’s early Galentine’s Day brunch, you won’t know whether bringing something that will fit your own food plan is necessary. So you go, you indulge, you vow to get back on track tomorrow, but shoot…you are also invited to lunch and the movies on Saturday. Now, you think, “the entire week is shot”.

Real friends and caring family should understand. But if they don’t; in order to achieve your goals, you must stay strong and advocate for yourself. If your sister cooks her famous Loaded Mac and Cheese and brings it to the table with pride - if you don’t smile and say, “Oh, none for me but it looks amazing”, you will wind up 15 minutes later with a belly full of cheese and regret. And maybe a little angry at your sister.

The idea of avoiding hurting anyone’s feelings versus your own is a losing proposition. You cannot fit your goals into your social life if you aren’t willing to fit your social life into your goals.

So, whose feelings are you risking to hurt? Yours, or others? Vote for yourself every time.